August 10, 2008

Wave Of Nostalgia.

I've needed more alone time than usual as of late; for me, moods shift just as the seasons do, and my personal composure, more often than not, coincides with them. I've been feeling pretty isolated and misunderstood these days, and it's frustrating and unwanted. The choices I've made in the past, the person I used to be at various junctures along my lifeline up to now, all the things I can't make sense of rationally - they reappear in my head like weeds. I don't know if it's any wiser to live life without regrets than with them, but I don't necessarily see my shortcomings as unnecessary mistakes; I've learned a lot from the things I've experienced, and I'm sure I wouldn't be who I am today had I not encountered what I did at just exactly the times I did, so in that respect I'm thankful for every experience I've had, even the sour or unpleasant ones. Sometimes, it's absolutely impossible to understand the purpose of some of my life's events, but those are the times my incompetence strengthens my respect for what, in particular, I happened to experience, regardless of it's function in my journey. Sometimes, you've got to try harder than you might even know how if you're going to find peace with the fallen glob of humanity that encases you.

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