October 17, 2007


Even if it's possible for one to forget the mistakes they have made in the past, don't ever let it happen. For me, my mistakes are forever a part of me, inevitably. This is a curse and a blessing, except the edges blur between the two and they end up being one and the same. I will forever remember the things I have been through in this life, as long as I continue to awake each and every morning. Sometimes I get so scared thinking about how fragile my life is...sometimes I wonder if my mistakes are not more than I make them out to be. We should always learn something from every situation we find ourselves present in. I have learned over the years that I am not the ultimate source of right and wrong. I mean, your parents try to teach you that, but no one can teach you something like that...you really have to realize at some point (having been used to thinking you are a god among mortals) that, given the opportunity, you sure do make a mess of things. I feel sometimes like I should be handing out apologies left and right...but I know that apologies are words, and that usually words are not our friends. People get into so much trouble using words. I think people should own licences in order to use words. I know that saying anything sometimes would be such a huge step backwards. If things are, for the most part, all better now, and time has refined every rusty, jagged edge, then why would I dig up with words what's already laid to rest? I never meant to hurt anyone, and yet I have, and I can't take it back. I'm sure the pain has been reduced to a dull ache, but still...I never meant any harm. I have affected the lives of others that I believe are good people, people that deserve great things. I hope for the best in everyone's lives I have been a part of.

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